If I Were a Lactobacillus

Here is another gift idea. Find a microscope and take pictures of things you see in it. You can turn the photos into T shirts, earrings, whatever you like. Like labels for your salsa, if you are still making it.

Salsa label directions:
You will need one moldy tomato.

You may have to buy a tomato for this. Or, go to a cafeteria and wait until someone pitches their tomato slice from lunch. That shouldn't take long. Leave it out for a few days, covered with an inverted glass, until it looks like the photo on the left. Mix some of the mold with a drop of water, and put it on a slide. What can you find?
This tomato has some Botrytis. The conidia (spores) look like tiny transparent grapes.
Take some pictures, and voila! You can use a regular digital camera for this - hold it up to the eyepiece and cup one hand around the edge between the two, to block extra light from getting in. I was going to post the label here too, but my program froze up before I could save the artwork....

Below is something slightly different. It's a snowflake-like pollen grain. In reality it is about 12 microns across.

If I were a juicy lactobacillus in a spoon of yogurt, this dandelion pollen grain would be the size of a large apple tree. That is, if the dandelion pollen fell in the yogurt. Otherwise I wouldn't even meet it. But the Botrytis spore on the tomato would think the pollen grain looked like a mini van. Actually it wouldn't look like that, because spores don't have eyes. And pollen doesn't have wheels or automatic windows.

The ever so melancholy time of year is coming in, when living things try to sneak off and take a break every chance they get. I sometimes forget to check on the Ganoderma fungus. It is alive - slowly extending its mycelial range in four 64 oz. size oatmeal containers now. They all live on top of the refrigerator, kind of like a trailer park, except when they go in the oven for a warm-up. . They know it is approaching the end of fall as well. They would like to come to a grinding halt, but that is a bad idea, because I won't know how to wake them up later. I will turn on the oven, and pop them in on warm overnight. Maybe tomorrow morning they will stretch their tiny white limbs and go for a walk through the sawdust.

Minnesota - Salsa and Sentence Padding

Please don't try to bleach your own flour. I was joking.

Here in Minnesota, sentiments, among other things, are well padded.
One easy way to cushion what you mean
is to use prefix and suffix words.
Now, some words HAVE prefixes or suffixes.
I am not talking about those words.
These words ARE the prefixes or suffixes.
They are the prefixes or suffixes of the sentence subject.
A common example might be "So, are you still OK over there, then?" In that sentence, there are four prefix words (if you consider the subject to be given), and three suffix words.
The ubiquitous "Sure, pretty good" is the correct answer to that question, with the inflection weighted just slightly onto the word "good." That sentence has either two prefix words OR two suffix words, take your pick.
These and those (above) are two great prefix or suffix words, and when combined with the suffix or prefix word "ones" can stand alone as an understated sentiment. You might even be able to fit them all twice in the same sentence for a total of six, but I'm not sure.

With no segue, I need to move right into the "holiday season." October is my cue to begin making gifts in dribbles. I enjoy squirreling these gifts away until mid December. I always seem to hide the list of giftees in a different spot than the gifts and can not find the list. So I mentally re-distribute each and every item, and dole them out a brand new way. No, those are not prefix words. They are something else. I think they are emotive words. I will let you know for sure next week. Which reminds me - the most expensive color is purple, for those of you who may be regular readers.

Gift project of the week: Mystery Salsa.
Canned tomatoes are on sale. They are perfect for this project, and cut the prep time way back. Green peppers have been on sale all year, it seems like. (three suffix words).

Here is my favorite recipe.
1 15 oz can chopped tomatoes
1 green pepper, seeded and chopped
1 medium yellow onion chopped
1/4 cup cider vinegar
1 jalapeno, or other pepper, chopped*
1 TBS sugar*
1/2 tsp ground cumin

You can double this recipe.

*I use different heat and or sugar sources for this recipe each time. 
In the past, any improvisation happened inadvertently, but this year I will hone the skill.
You try it too. Here is an opportunity to get creative. Stay focused on flavors and the all-important JAR LABEL. Imagine a catchy label such as Tupelo Honey and Serrano Salsa or Minnesota Mystery-Maple Salsa. Or Trehalose and Fire Ant Salsa. Just kidding. About the fire ants. We don't have them in Minnesota.

I do have Mystery peppers this year. They are so crazy hot! They were supposed to be non-spicy Anaheim eat-them-off-the-bush type, and I took a big bite right out in the garden. About halfway through the thought "this pepper has a sweet, yet pungent fruitiness that warms the tongue" I suddenly had to spit the whole bite right across the pepper plants and onto the green bean patch.

Whatever you choose for your sugar and heat, simmer everything together 45 minutes. Ladle boiling hot into hot, sterilized jars, cover with canning lids the way you always do, and process for 15 minutes. THAT was a whole slew of suffix words. Lots of padding!
And the innuendo of the words is staggering. Or maybe that is just the heat of the mystery peppers.

Make the jars pretty after everything has cooled off. Put it all in a box for later.

The Cheapest Color

White is the cheapest color in so many ways.
If you reduce a food to white, it will just sit there like a bump on a log.
case in point....
flour
rice
sugar
oil (sorry, gotta hydrogenate that to turn it white)
I am not talking about protein here, because that will still rot at room temperature if it has any moisture in it, even if it is white.This phenomenon can be put to good use, and it may occasionally save you money in the long run.

What about things that are not food? White is still cheap, when it comes to fabric and paper, because bleach is cheaper than dye and mordant.

White cars, are they the cheapest? Your insurance company will say "you betcha." I can not believe that is true in North Dakota in the middle of winter. On the other hand, maintaining a white yard in North Dakota in the winter is waaaaay cheaper than any other color. And no maintenance! Unless you feel the need to spiff your snow up. Or get in and out of your house after the blizzard.

I will come back later to cover the most expensive color.